Burnout happens to most of us now and then, especially during times of high, chronic stress — like now! Burnout can leave us feeling depleted, emotionally exhausted, and disconnected from what we care about. Whether you are experiencing burnout at work, in your role as a parent or caregiver, or in life in general, it’s how you respond to burnout that matters. Here are some ideas, based on cutting-edge and evidence-based practices from psychology, to help you cope with burnout.
Ten Tips for Transforming Burnout
Tip 1: Practice Acceptance. Burnout isn’t usually very fun, so you might be tempted to try to avoid or control the feelings associated with burnout. This can be a trap that just keeps you stuck. Instead, try approaching burnout with openness and acceptance. Remember that most people experience burnout occasionally, it’s normal to feel this way sometimes. Observing your burnout-related emotions and thoughts, with acceptance, can reduce the cycle of emotional avoidance and free you up to move forward.
Tip 2: Identify Unhelpful Self-stories. When feeling burned out, your mind might make things worse by telling you unhelpful stories, such as:
“I can’t take a break. I need to work harder to catch up.”
“I’m not good enough.”
“This is terrible.”
“This is never going to get better.”
Whatever your mind is telling you, just remember that your mind isn’t always right about everything, and you don’t need to buy into unhelpful self-stories. You can see them for what they are: Unhelpful thoughts that you don’t have to believe.
Tip 3: Loosen up on Perfectionism. Sometimes your own high-standards can trap you and lead to burnout. You may strive to be “perfect” — as a parent, a professional, etc. But the problem with perfectionism is that you’ll never get there — you’ll always be striving for more. And that struggle to doing everything very well all the time just adds more pressure to the situation. Instead, try going easy on yourself and practicing self-compassion. See if you can treat yourself the way you’d treat a loved one you care deeply about, in all their imperfection.
Tip 4: Try Not to Blame Yourself. When in a period of burnout, you might feel like there’s something wrong with you and blame yourself for struggling. It’s useful to keep in mind that burnout happens in a context, and sometimes you’re in an unsustainable situation that naturally has an emotional impact. Whether it’s a highly stressful situation, toxic environment, or a lack of supportive people, keep in mind that it’s not all your fault you’re feeling this way.
Tip 5: Prioritize Rest and Self-care. I know it can be hard to take time away from work when you’re busy and stressed — believe me! But working harder and harder without taking breaks won’t help, and in the long run you’ll probably be less efficient anyway. Your burnout might be telling you that you need something. Do you need to change something about your work or caregiving role? Do you need to take better care of yourself? Perhaps you need to get some rest, move your body, engage with a hobby you enjoy, or spend time with someone you care about. Take time to identify what you really need, and practice small, daily kindnesses toward yourself.
Tip 6: Get Support As far as I know, every research study on human connection shows the same thing: social support matters. A lot. We humans are social creatures - we’re wired that way! If you’re feeling alone with your experience, it can help to reach out to others for support. Share your struggles with someone — perhaps a friend, family member, or supportive coworker. And the support of a mental health professional can also be helpful during difficult times. Read an article I wrote for Psyche on How to Ask for Help for more on this!
Tip 7: Reconnect to your Values. We usually feel burnout in roles we care about. And yet, emotional detachment can be one of the signs of burnout — during periods of burnout you might feel like you’ve stopped caring about things that are normally important to you. It can help to reconnect with your values by clarifying what is meaningful to you, and focusing on living your values, in small ways and big ways, each day.
Tip 8: Learn to Say No. Be realistic about what you can accomplish, and learn to set boundaries, especially when it comes to obligations that aren’t important to you. Learning to say no will free you up to spend more time doing other important things, like taking a much-needed break, carving out time for fun, or spending more time engaging in the things that matter most to you. Prioritizing can help you find balance, and say yes to the aspects of your work or caregiving role that matter most to you.
Tip 9: Take Life One Moment at a Time. You might get so caught up in the long list of things you need to do that you feel overwhelmed and lose sight of what’s right in front of you. There’s a lot of research about how mindfulness can help with burnout. When you tune in to the present moment with mindful awareness, most of the time you’ll notice, “I’m okay right now.” A mindfulness practice, even just a few minutes per day, is a great way to practice self-care and reconnect with the present moment.
Tip 10: Take perspective. During periods of burnout you may feel like it will be this way forever. Burnout is temporary — it comes and goes over time. Remind yourself that this too shall pass. You’re going through a hard time, but it won’t be like this forever. And if burnout lasts a while, it might be a good time to make a change in your life, or reach out for help and strategies to help you move forward.
Bonus Tip: You may need a break or a vacation! Read about whether it’s time in my interview with Women’s Health: 10 Signs You Need A Vacation ASAP: And how to prevent the burnout breakdown before it happens.
Previous Posts in my Burnout Blog Series
Burnout 101: Exhausted by Meaningful Roles
Mastering Burnout: My Interview On Mindful Mastery
Parental Burnout: The Perfect Storm
Healthcare Professional Burnout
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